


Only Fools

by PeregrineWilliams



Category: Ouran High School Host Club - All Media Types
Genre: Canon - Manga, Comfort, Coming Out, Gen, Post-Canon, Thunderstorms, Unrequited Love, established Haruhi/Tamaki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:13:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22238437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeregrineWilliams/pseuds/PeregrineWilliams
Summary: I rewatched some episodes of Ouran after having last seen/read it when I was a teenager and now that I'm older, wiser, and gayer I had a Realization so I had to write this non-ship-centric ouran fic in the year 2020 I guess.Anyways here's Kyouya getting trapped by Haruhi into talking about his feelings, post-manga-canon.
Relationships: Fujioka Haruhi & Ootori Kyouya
Comments: 5
Kudos: 73





	Only Fools

**Author's Note:**

> (Also Haruhi is non-binary I just used she/her in this to make it easier on myself)

A knock sounded at Haruhi’s door and she jumped, nerves already on edge. She untangled herself from the blankets she had cocooned herself in and opened the door to her apartment. Some hopeful part of her expected Tamaki there, even though she knew that was impossible. Tamaki had been called back to Japan only two days ago, due to his grandmother’s sudden health complications. Haruhi couldn’t afford to go with him and miss school, risking her scholarship, and Haruhi certainly couldn’t expect Tamaki to put her silly fears above potentially losing his grandmother.

Rationally, she couldn’t expect him to be standing there, but she had expected Kyouya of all people even less so.

She looked up at him as she held the door open, too caught-off-guard to offer a greeting.

“Tamaki called me,” he said evenly, stepping past her to close the door on the cold wind and remove his jacket. “He told me he had looked up the weather for tonight in Boston, and insisted I stay with you,” he continued, as if that explained everything. Which it did. “Apologies for the intrusion.”

“I don’t need to be baby-sat,” she mumbled half-heartedly. She would have sent him off in any other circumstance, but in truth, she was overjoyed to see him - to see anyone she trusted - and be assured of another presence with her through the major thunderstorm that was meant to happen tonight.

He looked down at her through his glasses, in that critical way that concealed what was going on behind them while letting her know he could tell exactly what she was thinking. “Sorry, King’s orders,” he replied, allowing her to retain her dignity for the moment at least.

He showed himself to her bathroom and returned a few minutes later in his sleeping clothes, clearly having resigned himself to spending the night. 

“Would you like some tea?” she grumbled a little, already boiling water for herself.

“That would be lovely, thank you,” he replied, pulling a container out of his bag and bringing it over to her. “But use this, please, not whatever powdered leaves you bought at the convenience store.”

Haruhi huffed in annoyance but did as she was told, taking the container to make two cups of tea that probably cost more than her dad’s rent. She wasn’t really in the mood to argue right now.

She brought the cups to the coffee table in front of the couch that were features of her american student apartment, and cocooned herself in her blankets again before taking her cup to sit with her. Kyouya sat beside her with his own tea, closer than he usually would. Tamaki probably warned him about how she could be. He must pity her. She felt pathetic.

As she drank though, she started to feel herself relax. Her nerves that had felt frayed at the ends seemed to dull comfortably as the warmth spread through her. She was safe in her apartment, in her blankets, with a good friend, and it was going to be okay. After a few more sips it occurred to her that this was actually probably a calming tea meant for her anxiety; Kyouya didn’t just insist on it because he was too good to drink her commonor’s tea, he brought it special for her because he thought it might help. She glanced at him, and sure enough, he had barely sipped any himself. She felt a little guilty for her grouchiness, now. Kyouya was actually always quite sweet and thoughtful, he just usually liked to maintain his shield of plausible deniability like this. He really did care about her.

Haruhi set down her cup and turned to him to apologise just as the first crack of thunder hit. He very nearly avoided spilling his own cup as she instinctively launched herself at his arm. She clung to him tightly as she anticipated the next strike, barely registering his movements as he shifted to wrap himself around the burrito she had become.

She cracked her eyes open after a few minutes to see her cup held in front of her face. “You should drink the rest,” he said, uncharacteristically gently. She nodded, embarrassed, and downed it quickly. Probably a little too fast, but she didn’t want to risk spilling it all over him if she jumped again. He set the cup aside again and held her close, tucking her head under his chin and against his chest. Tamaki used this strategy often, since the steady thump of his heartbeat gave her a regular, calming noise to focus on instead.

She flinched when the next crack came, but it was much more subdued as she actually felt herself start to drift off. She was warm and her mind was all fuzzy. This must be some pretty strong tea.

* * *

Haruhi woke in the morning to soft daylight streaming in through the blinds of her living room. She was still on the couch, still half-in her blanket cocoon, with Kyouya wrapped around her from behind.

She rolled over to watch his face as he slowly regained consciousness himself, awakened by her movement. Now that Haruhi was rested and not in an anxious state of mind influenced by her fears, she felt deeply touched by the lengths Kyouya had gone for her to make her feel safe. He wasn’t much of a touchy guy in general, but he must have gathered that the physical proximity was a comfort to her. He had stayed with her through it all just to make sure she didn’t wake up in the middle of it, alone and afraid.

She smiled at him as he blinked at her, unused to seeing him without his glasses. He looked younger, somehow. “Good morning, Kyouya,” she said softly. “I just wanted to say, thanks for doing all of this. You really didn’t have to. And sorry for being kind of… prickly last night towards you.”

“You were on edge, it was understandable,” he replied at the same volume, yawning a little. He smiled back at her, but she noticed his eyes seemed a bit hollow and almost conflicted, bare without his glasses.

She suddenly remembered what Tamaki had been trying to get her to see for a while, her naivety when it came to situations like this, that she was starting to understand better now that she had developed feelings for Tamaki herself. She had an effect on people, and just because Haruhi didn’t care, didn’t mean other people had the same idea. She tried to look at it objectively, the fact that Kyouya had just spent the night sleeping next to her, along with being uncharacteristically touchy and gentle.

She swallowed nervously as she thought about how to delicately bring up the subject. “Hey Kyouya… you’re… a good friend of mine, right?”

He quirked an eyebrow at her. “I should hope so. Are you concerned about something?”

He seemed relatively unbothered by the word ‘friend,’ and that seemed like a good sign, but Kyouya was also a good actor. “I was just hoping you were… satisfied with that,” she tried.

His brow furrowed as he looked at her, presumably attempting to figure out what she was implying. Recognition seemed to dawn, and he snorted a laugh. “You’re wondering if my heart has been moved by spending the night with you in my embrace?” he asked with a theatrical lit reminiscent of Tamaki’s. “You don’t have anything to worry about on that front. You’re not the one I have feelings for,” he assured, then quickly looked away, reaching for his glasses to put back on his face.

“So you do have feelings for someone?” Haruhi asked curiously. She supposed there was a lot about Kyouya’s life outside of Ouran Academy that she didn’t know much about. It would explain his unease at their situation, if he already felt committed to someone else.

He sighed in resignation. “Unfortunately, and despite my unwillingness, I suppose I do. Are you satisfied?”

It was a surprise to Haruhi at least. He hadn’t seemed to show interest in much of anything outside of his family and the host club itself. “You don’t enjoy having feelings for someone?”

“I don’t enjoy having feelings in general, if I’m being honest. They’re quite the nuisance. But no, in this case, there is no possibility for reciprocation, so my feelings have no merit in that regard. I am not even an option to be considered.”

She frowned, taking his hand and holding it to her chest. “Kyouya, don’t be so down on yourself, you’re smart, and handsome, and kinder than you think you are,” she insisted. “Anyone would be lucky to have you.” 

He smiled at her a little sadly, brushing a strand of hair out of her face as he gazed at her with an honest appreciation. “But ‘anyone’ would be far luckier to have you.”

The sentence ended abruptly, and Haruhi felt his hand stiffen, as if he regretted what he had just said, as if he felt he had slipped up. Haruhi thought about it for a long moment, not quite sure what hidden meaning he thought he had revealed, until it hit her all at once along with a tidal wave of memories that suddenly had significantly more meaning.

“You… Kyouya, are you… in love with Tamaki?” she asked, her voice barely more than a whisper, as if she would scare him off if she asked any louder.

He didn’t answer, only tipped his face so that the glare on his glasses hid his eyes from her. It was as good as a verbal confirmation. Haruhi knew how difficult it was for him to discuss his feelings, and his reluctance to lie to her only indicated to Haruhi how much Kyouya trusted her at this point. “I’m so-”

“I don’t want your pity,” he cut her off gently. “He wouldn’t be good for me anyways, really. I’ve thought it through, many times, as I’m sure you could expect. You’re much more suited to handling him. He can break me too easily, when he really wants something…”

“You did this for him, not for me, didn’t you?” Haruhi asked, still running through her memories as she put the pieces together.

He nodded, staring off above her head. “Not that I don’t care about you as well, but I did believe myself to be the least suited to providing comfort. He asked me, though, and he knows if it’s important to him, I’ll make it happen.”

“You put all the work you did into running the host club because you wanted to make him happy,” she muttered, almost incredulously.

“I did it for myself, too. He was an enigma to me, when we met. I wanted to see where this train of his would take me if I boarded. A glimpse into his way of life. To see if the grass really was greener, and all that. But you’re right, a primary reason was just… because I wanted to see him smile more, I suppose,” he admitted with a sigh.

“I’m sorry he never saw how you really felt,” Haruhi replied, an ache in her chest for him.

“He’s always been the most blind when it came to himself. It took him almost a year to recognise his  _ own _ feelings for you, you think I would have ever had a chance? He’s far too stupid for me,” he scoffed.

Haruhi snorted. “Well you’re right about that. You deserve way better. I’ll help you find someone.”

“Don’t you start using your Host instincts on me now,” he tutted. “I can achieve my ‘happy ending’ just fine on my own, thank you very much. I must ask though, that you wouldn’t reveal this information to anyone else, and especially not to him...”

“I won’t,” she said quickly. “I swear.” She could barely imagine how difficult it would be for him if any inkling of this got to his family, judging by how conservative and strict they seemed.

He smiled at her again, in a genuine but weary sort of way. “Thank you,” he said softly. “You’re the only one that knows, actually, and as determined as I was to never let anyone find out… it does actually feel somewhat freeing now that you do.”

“I felt like that too, actually, after I got used to being a host,” she said, smiling back at him. “I wasn’t trying to hide it before, in the same way, but being seen as a boy for most of the day was freeing for me too somehow. I think it’s the ‘seeing’ part. I see you for who you are more fully now, so you don’t have to hide as much of yourself, and that’s comforting.”

“As comforting as it is frightening, I would imagine,” he sighed again. “Personal information is something I’ve always excelled in obtaining from others. It gives me the power to manipulate, help, and destroy them at my discretion. I always managed to keep my own safely confidential until…”

“Until Tamaki,” she supplied.

“Until Tamaki,” he repeated wearily. “And you, actually. You were the second to see through me. It was rather annoying until… I suppose I got used to the idea that I could be candid with someone, and they wouldn’t use it against me…”

“You know that’s what friendship is, right?” Haruhi smiled.

“Theoretically,” he huffed.

She propped herself up on her elbows to look down at him. She supposed by the way he talked, Kyouya only really had two friends: herself and Tamaki. The rest of the host club were his friends in a way, but she couldn’t imagine him being able to have a conversation like this with anyone else. She felt honoured to be trusted by him. “Your family always had high expectations for you, but Tamaki was the first person to accept you the way that you were right then, wasn’t he? That’s why he was so special to you initially,” she thought out loud.

He seemed to ponder this for a minute, rolling over to stare at the ceiling. “I… suppose that’s probably true,” he said quietly. “If I’m being honest, he might have been...”

He trailed off into silence, until Haruhi had to ask, “What?”

He grimaced. “It feels stupid to say.”

“Hey, I doubt it will be stupid. You’re the smartest person I know. And even if it is, you can trust me not to judge you for it. We’re friends, this is what friends do. This will help you get used to it.”

“You’re proving the point I was about to make, I suppose,” he sighed in resignation, but still hesitated a moment before continuing quietly. “I was going to say, he might have been the first person I wasn’t afraid of. I remained stoic and composed so no one would even have a chance to use my personal information against me. I could allow myself to be vulnerable around him for the first time because he was too genuinely kind - and, frankly, too stupid - to hurt me like that.”

Haruhi nodded, her heart aching for him again. His life sounded so… lonely. “You should have sleepovers with me more often,” she decided, “And we can just relax and study and talk sometimes, and have a break from the general chaos-prone tendancies of our other friends.”

He smiled, closing his eyes and tucking his arms behind his head. “That does sound attractive, actually. Thank you for… allowing me this.”

“That’s what friends are for, Kyouya,” she smiled back, bumping his shoulder before rolling off the couch to stretch. “I’ll make some more tea, if you’re alright with ‘powdered leaves from the convenience store’ this time.”

“I’ll tolerate it,” he said in mock irritation before his tone shifted to hesitant again. “I do actually have something I would like to ask you about, if it’s not too personal…”

“Shoot,” she replied as she started her water boiling.

“Would you… talk to me about yourself, and your father? I regret that I am not very knowledgeable about other people like… me… or you…,” he said, his attempt to be delicate clear. “By which I mean, if I have the terms correct, gender non-conforming, and not-heterosexual… Your father is bisexual? Is that correct?”

She nodded reassuringly back at him. “What would you like to know?”


End file.
